While growing up, I lived my whole childhood live planning and negotiating how my future will be with myself. I never wanted to leave anything to chance. I don’t just believe in it. I don’t want to see myself living in success because I am “lucky.” I had always wanted it to be the fact that I really worked hard, believed and succeeded.
While I had great hope and aspirations, something was missing. I failed to realize that people will treat you the way they feel or want. Nobody, and I mean no one really cares about you or what you are feeling. They show the care when you present to them a tangible substance they cannot do without.
The missing ingredient in my plan was the preparedness for rejection. I never expected to be rejected. I am the child of God; I have the blessings of God overshadowing my life. I am made to be great. All of these were the mantras I held on to that made me blind to the reality that even Jesus was rejected in his homeland.
My journey into the freelance world made me see what is missing in my plans. I found out that it is not all about acceptance always. And in the process, I discovered so many things I want to share.
Why You should Expect Rejections
Do I sound pessimistic? Well, you’ve to understand that life itself is in two phases – good and evil, day and night, light and darkness, wealth and poverty, big and small, tall and short …. acceptance and rejection and many more. The polarity that exists in the world is a natural feature of the planet earth and we should all be prepared for it. And these are some of the reasons I believe we all should expect rejections.
Everyone Thinks Differently
The first truth you must accept is that we all don’t think alike. We think differently. The differences in our patterns of thoughts make it hard and a bit difficult for us to always get accepted by all.
While some people easily feel connected to our pattern of thinking, others feel awkward at it. I am sure someone reading this part of my piece is feeling awkward already. You know, it is how life is and there is next to nothing we can do about it.
Our Expectations Differ
Yes! This is a truth I can defend anywhere. In the last four years, personally, I have written over 150 books for various authors, and my writing agency (wordflex consult) had handled over 100 books in the last 15 months of our existence.
The numbers could have been higher, but for the fact that there were times I could not meet up with the expectations of the client during the interview stage, some of them had to seek other writers. One thing this has taught me is that, I can never meet everyone expectations. So, learn it as well.
We All Have Our Preferences
I am sure you will not argue this with me. Regardless of how closely we bond together, we cannot have the same preference at all time. We all have things we like and those we despise.
This same attitude of preference translates to how we relate and choose the people we mingle or work with. Everyone can never choose you over the other person in all situations. People decide who to work with base on their preferences at times.
So Many Other People Are Good as Well
As a freelancer, the most dangerous impression you can give yourself is to think you are the only one who is the best at what you do. There are other talents out there. These talents are also seeking expression and people to hire them. So, you are in a deep competition with others and when you know this, you have to just accept rejections some time.
You Don’t know it all
This is another bitter truth but it is worthy of taking note. You don’t know everything about your niche and there are some people who are only interested in what you don’t know. While some clients will give you the benefit of doubt and test your ability to work on new topics, others don’t even have the time to check and see if you can do it or not.
Life itself has a force behind it. It doesn’t just exist on its own. Certain things will not just work for you. It doesn’t mean you have done anything wrong. Don’t think you are being punished for any crime. It is just that it is how life is and the earlier you understand it, the better as well.
In my understanding, the rejections we receive are not all the result of our wrongdoings or ineptness. Some are caused by the other party, while some are as a result of nature. Know this and have peace.
Dealing With Rejections
If there is a problem, there will definitely be a solution. Only unidentified problems exist without solutions. I am going to share the lifestyles I adopted to deal with my rejections with you and hope you would have a fantastic experience.
Be Prepared for it
Before I set up my writing agency, each time I sent out proposals to prospective clients, I was always ready to receive a No. Why? I knew I had a lot of factors working against me. First is the fact that I am not a native speaker of the English language. I only trained myself to write well and I knew many native speakers would find it hard to trust me with their projects. So, the few who did, I made sure I wowed them.
Since I was prepared for the worst, each time I got a No, I felt bad but for a short period. And it still works until now. Just know that people will not always go for you or your brand.
Don’t Stop reaching out
This is one of my secrets as a freelance writer. I don’t back down when it comes to sending out proposals. I have seen freelancers who stopped sending proposals after sending just 15 or 20 proposals. It takes a while to hit the gusher when you are seeking clients except for those who are “lucky” enough t0 hit the nail on the head at their first try. For every rejection you get, compensate yourself with 5 other applications.
Improve Your Skills
You will be unwise if you keep sending mails, proposals to prospects but you fail to have the right skills you need to execute the projects you are requesting. Prospects know the right person to give their jobs to right from the interview stage. So, if you want to stay ahead of your game, you have to scale up your skill. Learn the new norms and conventions in your niche. Don’t ever stay in a single position. It doesn’t work for anyone and I doubt it will work for you.
Take Note of The Rejections and Evaluate Them
I love the words of John C. Maxwell. He said that “Evaluated experience is the best teacher not just experience.” So, someone might receive rejection but if they fail to evaluate it, know why they were rejected, they will keep receiving it. When a prospect turns down your offer, try to know the reason. You can ask the prospect why he or she is not working with you. At times, some prospects give honorable responses.
The purpose of the feedback is to help you know how best you can improve yourself while you prepare your next proposal.
Take Note of Your Wins and Evaluate Them
If something works for you in the past, there is a probability that it will work for you again. So, each time someone accepts you, evaluate the experience and find out the reason you were accepted. It helps you see what you did wrong when you were rejected and you can intentionally work on yourself to always receive acceptance most times.
Remain Grateful When You Are Rejected
Practice gratitude each time you are rejected. How do I do this? I remember the best offers I have been granted. I look at the present projects I am handling and I know I have no reason to be afraid or sad. When you bring your past wins to remembrance, you will easily see that the rejection you had is not all about you.
We all despise rejection but it is part of life and we must be prepared for it. While we are preparing for it, we need to position ourselves rightly to be accepted more than we are rejected. If you can work on yourself and increase your skills, you would be surprised at how well you will be accepted. Don’t forget, rejection doesn’t mean you are useless or unfit. It only shows you are not compatible with the prospect and you need to keep searching.